[Sigh]

Sometimes, there are events in our lives that we cannot explain. Some people say that everything happens for a reason. I want to believe this. Really, I do. But, I don’t subscribe to the notion that things were meant to happen and that there’s a destiny and that we have a fate in store for us. But, sometimes things occur that are really coincidental. I was watching tv and the story of Jesus and the shroud of Turin happen to be on. And, at the same time, ideals on atheism, the lack of a higher power and such have also somehow become more prevalent. It’s weird. It doesn’t change my outlook on things. Everything happens not for a reason, but by chance, and by coincidence and are noticed especially when you’re looking for it.

I’m trying with effort to move on. I’ve resigned to the notion that if it was meant to be, it will happen (hence the notion that I wish things happen for a reason). If she truly loves me, she shall come. If there is a chance, she will take it. Until then, I must move on and accept that we’re not in the right place for what we thought was a good thing. She has to learn on her own whether or not what she has now is actually the right thing for her. And I must accept that, regardless of how hard that may be. If I never get her back, well… I will always remember the good times and will always have a place in my heart for my Pamela.

I love you. I always will and I know inside you love me. You just have to work out what is you need to work out. If it’s true, you’ll end up with your happiness. And I’ve accepted that. I won’t wait for you. However, if it comes my way, I will not deny you.