Friday, January 07, 2011

Free Write

Postule nodes
And made-up words all jumbled inside
Hirly Tirly
Me-oh-my
And reckless abandonment
But not really
Really?
A million miles a minute but still stuck in that same hopeless spot
as a second ago not really knowing where I'm going
And not knowing where I've been
But knowing I'm going nowhere

Hirly Tirly
Me-oh-my

The same caddywumpkins and the same hickerdoodles
The same bullshit on this different day
And I'm swirling like ice cream and grape juice
In a stainless steel blender
Disgusting but probably tasty
That same sweet taste as yesterday but gone tomorrow

Hirly Tirly
Me-oh-my

Lopsided crunchymunch
Teleopop kisses
In a psychostatic wonderland of rorschach tests
Ink blots and bitches
A vagina in every stain
Really?

Me-oh-my

Because hirly and tirly are so yesterday
Bebopping to the jazz of a hundred plus years of mind-numbing bumping
That low-frequency thumping
I don't know what's coming

Oh yeah

Here we go on that epileptic journey of one thousands shakes
And no memory to show for it
All chumfuzzery with a bacon-filled dream and
Two lazy eclairs filled with someone else's priorities
But fimdiddlyful of tastiness nonetheless

Because that's what makes the million miles a minute roll like sushi on Sunday
And the rice sticky to the touch
And that feeling you get after masticating
It's dirty

Me-oh-motherfucking-tirly-my

Kaleidoscope minds are working full-time
But moving at a snail's pace in this hell hole
That hope is still there but can you blame me for not trying?
Cumdilliasms and minor twitchfissures
OMG and WTF?!
Time to harness those beasts inside
Or should they be let loose?
Out onto the sea of light green metaphors and purple waves of
I don't know... hickory? Chutney?

Hirly Tirly
Me-oh-my

Just another fucking day in a blender
Blending but without the ingredients that make
For a great milkshake
And I don't know what I'm saying anymore
It's all just saccharin sweet and cancer-causing
But it's okay because the phizzlean peacock and
the motionless monsters watch

It's all about the sacred cow
You know?
And the blue Hawaiian punch but without the
Azure tint and the electrifying taste
It's bland
But the Kool-Aid man always says "Oh Yeah!"

Me-Twiddlee-Dee

Exhausted

Sunday, January 02, 2011

Holy shit! A new decade??!

Well, it looks like we're on the start of yet another decade. And I didn't even notice the first. Where the fuck does the time go? Having not accomplished anything the first 10 years of the 2000's, I think I should put down some goals for the coming year, if not the next 10.

Move out of this fucking house

I don't know if I've shared this or not but I live in a home with a family of 7 (two adults and 5 kids). Children range in age from 12 years old to 10 months. Two words can adaquately describe my feelings about this situation: fucking hell. Of course, I can't complain about the price of it all. It's free. My friend allows me to live here as long as I help out around the house, watch the kids sometimes and do things like.. well, everything. I've given up my privacy, social life, pride and my sanity just to live in this household. Is it worth it? Absolutely not. I think this is what it feels like to have sold one's soul to the devil.

Finish school

I think I live in such a horrid environment because my one and only goal for the immediate future is to finish my college education. Like most stupid 20-somethings, my priorities when I was younger were in a different place. Being young and stupid does have its consequences. So, in my late [muffle muffle]'s, I've decided that the most important task for me to complete is to get my degree. This, more than anything, is for personal achievement. I mean, where am I going to use a philosophy degree anyway? I don't even think I'll be able to get a job managing a Taco Bell with my credentials. There's a conflict in that I want out of my home situation now but it's going to take me 2 more years to complete my Bachelor's program. Maybe I'll actually try and sell my soul to the devil. It couldn't be any worse than this (I wonder if I can consign my soul).

Restart on the road to a more physically-fit me

I've done this every year since I was an embryo. Trying to get back into shape so that I can look and feel better (and get the hot chicks. Yeah!). Each year it has got harder and harder to do, especially at my old age. This year, it's no different. But, different from other years, I'm going to try this time. I don't have too many years left; my skin is starting to lose its elasticity. Maybe I should drink more water, too.

Relaunch my web and print efforts

I once had a thriving print and web zine where I wrote some really good articles, got to see some really good films and had the opportunity to talk to some really cool people. I think it's time to relaunch the effort. I mean, I have the time. I ain't gots no job. Ya know?

So, I guess I shall look at the new year with positivity. I'll keep my chin up and my feet to the ground, while keeping my cynicism and negativity in check. Some say that there's always a light at the end of the tunnel. And while that light for me is still a pin prick in the fabric of darkness, it's there. And god damn it, I will eventually reach the end of this hellacious journey. One way or another.

My secondary goal, if all else fails: win the Lotto.