A Time for Comfort

Tonight a friend called me to wish me a Happy New Year and all of that. I could tell there was something wrong but she asked and I immediately went into how great my New Year's was and how I thought '08 was going to be this fucking awesome year and what I had planned and what my goals and aspirations were. But, I realized I was talking about myself too much and that I knew there was something wrong with her so I asked her.. what's wrong?

Her grandfather died this morning.

I felt so bad that it was all about me for the first 5 minutes of the conversation. Everything became about her and her feelings; I wanted to console and comfort, I wanted to make sure she was okay. I told her that he was in a better place and that he is no longer suffering. It was okay to be selfish in that she missed him terribly and that she couldn't let go. It was okay. We all need to be selfish once in awhile. Just grieve and be happy that you had spent those years with him. Be happy that you have those fond memories. Be happy you got to see him before he passed. We all lose someone we love. And, we'll never see them again. It's a part of life. Be thankful you had that time to spend together.

I'm really glad that she could call and get comfort from me. It feels good to be there for your friends. It reinforces the importance of friendship and that she will be my friend for life, even though she is hundreds of miles away. I am there for her as she is for me and that's just a special thing. Especially in times of loss.

Feel privileged if you have a friend like that.